Thursday, November 12, 2009

When traditions change...

The only times that my extended family get together are funerals, weddings, and (the subject of this particular posting) Thanksgiving. So once a year, I torture The Hubby and make him head to my hometown to visit with my family. It normally consists my dad's side of the family gathering at the grandparents' house for a Thanksgiving lunch. We stuff ourselves silly with turkey and us grandchildren fight for a piece of our grandma's blackberry pie. (I have since had better blackberry pie but tradition is tradition. I think she likes us vying for a piece for she always makes sure that there is a blackberry pie... just one to facilitate the fight.)

Over the past few recent years, the lunch has changed slightly. It was still held at the grandparents; that part did not change. The first year of change is that we ate on paper plates... less clean up... the year after that, my aunt (dad's sister) did the main part of cooking while everyone else brought a dish... and now this year...

About a month ago, my grandma called to see if it was okay that we met at a local restaurant for a buffet. You see, the size of our family gathering grew a good bit now that my brother has moved back with his family. No one's house can accommodate the number of people.... (roughly 20 people). It seemed that she was looking for my okay. I can understand the amount of work and chaos with that many people... and frankly, I can kind of heard the slight pleading in her voice. After all, we are going there to visit with everyone so what if the location is different.

Well, now that has changed too... as of my last phone call home, the lunch is not going to happen. Apparently, it was a little bit more expensive (about $3 more per person plus drinks, tip & tax) than originally thought. Grandma and my Aunt decided that it will be a bit too much for everyone to pay that. So now what?

Everyone fends for themselves for lunch and meet up at the grandparents house for dessert. :( As the phone conversation continued, I realized that a set time was not picked. I can totally seeing everyone dropping in at different times throughout the afternoon and no one getting to see anyone. So, I made Grandma pick a time for everyone to meet up at the house for dessert.

This whole scenario bothers me... This is not the Thanksgiving that I grew up with... nor is it the Thanksgiving that I wanted the Little One to grow up with. Unfortunately, The Hubby and I are the ones that live the furthest away (3 1/2 hours away). We would totally host Thanksgiving if we knew that the family would all travel here... but we know for a fact that they will not. Due to work schedules, we are not able to take off more time so that we could prepare the Thanksgiving feast there. Plus, that would not take care of the problem of not having a large enough location. We also do not have the funds to pay for everyone to eat at the restaurant.

So, I really do not see anything that we can do. I certainly do not want to stay home and miss even the small opportunity to see the whole family together (especially for the Little One). So, The Hubby, Little One, and myself will need to fend for ourselves with some hometown restaurant... and head to Thanksgiving dessert at the grandparents.

The only question that remains is.... do we still "fight" over the blackberry pie?

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