Tuesday, November 30, 2010

I am so tired.

I’m not simply talking about wanting to head back to bed… although that sounds simply delightful right now too. I’m just plain tired and I’m having trouble holding myself together.

I know that having money doesn’t solve everything. At least, I know that in my heart but right now my head I am thinking it will solve a whole hell of a lot in my life. I am tired of wondering where the money is going to come from for the next set of bills.

I am so tired.

This feeling is starting to penetrate into the other aspects of my life. Hmm… I guess that is not being completely honest. Please strike the word “starting” from that previous sentence. This feeling has been seeping in for some time.

I can hardly drag myself out of bed in the morning. I am getting up as late as possible but still manage to get to work on time for the majority of the days of the week. I am eating whatever I want without keeping in my mind the consequences of said actions.

I can not even remember the last time that I had an optimistic thought.

I am so tired.

I can not describe it in any other way. The Hubby just prefers to ignore the situation that we are in. He hopes that some day the magical world of a great economy will open up and offer us a brilliant job that will solve all our problems. Perhaps this could happen… I doubt that it is going to happen anytime soon. I’m worried about the now for honestly, it is too difficult to think about the future.

I need to find a way to get out of this funk.

I’m simply tired of being tired.

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