Dear Post Office worker,
I do realize that it is a pain the ass in trying to deliver the mail to the individual homes when the shoveling is not done. Because of this, I do my sincere best to make sure that our mailbox is shoveled out so that you can drive up in your little mail truck. No need to get out. After all, it is winter and it is freakin’ cold out there. Besides, we can’t really afford to have late fees on the bills that we receive because you withheld it. Money is way too tight for that.
However, I really do not appreciate the little “letter” that you left with my mail yesterday stating that I need to make sure that 30 feet surrounding my mailbox needs to be shoveled out. EXCUSE ME!? 30 feet?? You don’t even drive a full size vehicle! You are driving a little mail truck. MY OWN CAR can drive up to the mailbox and exit with no problems. I drive a freakin’ Mercury Tracer!
30 feet my ass!?! I value my back and arms too much to do this.
How about this… why don’t you call the city plow trucks and tell them to please plow the road in front of my house closer than 5 feet from the beginning of my driveway. That way, my remaining strength is not completely used up by shoveling the actual road but being used to make sure the appropriate space around my mailbox. While you’re at it, why don’t you tell them that when they are plowing the road that intersects my road in front of my house, they can dump the snow a little further down so I’m not left shoveling that too in front of my mailbox and driveway.
You scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.